Farewell.

Remembering Ruby






My Mom, Ruby Carolyn Pittman... she was one of a kind. Kind to everyone she'd meet. She'd give you the shirt off her back if she could help you. My Mom was a decent human being. Helped families with children who were less fortunate, would go out of the way to help a friend, and when it came to family... she was devoted to her husband (Johnny) and to her daughter, me (Martha).


She wore many hats... Bartender, Waitress, Cashier, Florist/Landscaper, Supervisor, Wife, Mom, Best Friend... she was good at all of them... and worked DAMN hard at each of them.

My Mom liked to have a good time. Her favorite things in this world was fooling around with plants (which she did for a living as a distributor for Pure Beauty Plant Farms), watch football, and read.

She was a kind, gentle, loving soul... and no one can ever say different.

Her heart got broken a lot (I guess that runs in the family) by others she'd place her love and faith in who would always fall short of her expectations. She'd love people so much and expect such good things in them only to have them hurt her, again & again. This happened with certain family members more often than not... and some times with friends she considered her family. She put others before herself... in the end, I wish she hadn't... because she was more important than some she wasted her time on.

To me, she was Mom. She birthed me. 9 months inside this woman... she said she ate chicken liver and pickles. She gave up smoking during her pregnancy to have me.

But she had me... and we went on a hell of a ride from 1977 to 2013.


In my younger years, I took my Mom for granted. I think all of us do when we are young and impulsive. Not knowing that later on, when they are no longer with us, we will regret what we didn't say or do ... and wish we had more time... just for the little things. My Mom always took time for me. Always. She would stop to talk to me on the phone all the time, when we lived together or near each other she was always letting me tag along with her if she went places... even just to get groceries. Those are the BEST TIMES I ever had in my life. Just me and my Mom. We'd joke, laugh, talk... I had a special relationship with her... she was more than MOM she was my best friend for most of my life. People would look at us strange cause I'd say "Up yours" and she respond "Sideways"... it was our inside joke to each other... had been for years.  


Through all my trials and tribulations my Mom was by my side. Rooting for me when I marched at half time in the marching band through my high school years, standing beside me when I went through a divorce, holding my hand when I had a miscarriage or nose polyp surgery... and saving my life when I had a heart attack. Yea, my Mom was some kind of special. She was my mom.


Had I known my time with her would be so fucking brief in this world, I would have told her how much I loved her and appreciated her more. Oh how I loved this woman... how I still do. My heart hurts because she isn't here with me... but, she still is in a way. I can sometimes hear her voice in my head saying to keep going or stay strong. I can feel her smile at me when I do something she'd be proud of.... and in the end I strive everyday to make her proud. I try to do one thing EVERYDAY Mom would have wanted me to do even if it is just for me ... I think she'd want that.


My Mom's Urn.




Cancer... Cancer is a horrible disease. They told Mom she had it in May... come July she was gone. She told me 2 days before she died she was walking out of that hospital. But she didn't. It took her fast... 3 months... That fast. No time. No time at all. I would have traded all the possessions in the world... to save my Mom. She saved MY life... I could not save her.



If you smoke, please consider stopping. My Mom smoked from age 13 up till she was diagnosed in May with Lung Cancer. The cancer ate her pancreas, her ribs, her brain... it took all of her... and it took her from me. Smoking is NOT worth the risk. Think of the people who love you... and how DEVASTATED they would be if you died. Don't put them through it... it's not worth any pain to you or your loved ones. Believe me I know. I've lived through it with both Mom and Dad.
Also I say this... CHERISH YOUR PARENTS. I lost mine 5 months apart. One day they are gone and you are left with so much you wish you said and done... but it's too late. Honor them and love them while they are here ... don't live with regret. Life is TOO short.



Mom, I love you. Miss you. It's like part of me died the day you left.
I know Dad's with you... you got my baby too... take care of each other.
I'll be with you one day. Until then... I'll make you proud.
You were the BEST Mom a kid could have asked for. I was privileged to call you Mom.
Thank you.
For everything.
My heart is always with you...



2 comments:

kuppy kake said...

I clicked the link u posted on fb...ended up here. your mom reminds me of myself..what I do for others...what ends up being done to me. my grandmother raised me as one of her own...after my parents divorced. she will always be my mom. she passed away in june 2011 from emphysema. I know greatly how u feel about your mom and the pain of losing her. theres not a day that goes by ive not thought of mamaw noel. like u said on fb to me...u have me also.

MonsterMartha said...

My grandmother had emphysema so I totally know what you are talking about. My Mom was more than "MOM" she was my best friend, advisor, rock, buddy... she was my world. Being an ONLY CHILD ... I wasn't spoiled with ANYTHING but I knew I always had her to go to. It was hard not having her at all... suddenly. She was told in May of 2013 and by July... it was all over.